Because of its incredible success, it is worth studying the Avatar screenplay and its story structure. With the top two highest grossing movies ever behind his name, writer/director Jim Cameron knows what he is doing. These are not studio-driven movies: they are personal obsessions. Titanic was Cameron’s excuse (and funding source) to continue his infatuation with the deep ocean, while Avatar is now apparently all he wants to do – ever again. The sequels Avatar II, III and IV, which the director is working on in his new home in New Zealand, are currently scheduled for 2017 and 2019.

The Avatar Screenplay

Avatar is in essence a simple ‘boy meets girl’ story within the action genre, and it covers a whole range of themes – if you want to see them – from environmentalist, anti-colonialist, to buddhist. The movie is long, but clearly not too long, telling from its success. The post-production script  was only 110p.

How come Cameron’s movies put half the planet at the edge of their seat? No-one – probably not even Jim himself – know. But I believe his understanding of mythical storytelling has something to do with it. The only way to connect with a planet-wide audience, is to tap into the mythology of the times.

The film abounds with mythical imagery and archetypes. Jakes doesn’t just have one mentor. He has three. In the Ordinary World, Colonel Quaritch gives him the life lessons; once on Pandora, Neytiri will take that function. During the transition from the one world to the next, Jake’s third mentor, the ‘threshold mentor’, is played by played by Sigourney Weaver as Grace. The last thing she says to Jake, just before the start of the Threshold sequence is “Just keep your mouth shut.” He is going into unknown territory and will have to let his mentor(s) lead him. Throughout the scene, Grace keeps giving Jake advise. “Don’t run,” but a moment later “Run! Definitely run!”

Join Cameron’s Screenwriting Class

Avatar has been lauded for its eye candy, but too easily despised for its screenplay. In my view, any critics just don’t like this type of cinema, as Cameron’s screenplays are excellent. In fact, many of his peers could learn from him. Cameron doesn’t have to deliver a script to the industry standard, or any standard for that matter. Yet his screenplays are prime examples for any beginning screenwriter: clear, tight, visual, well-formatted, and with clear, dramatic subtext written into the scenes where necessary. Don’t forget that these are action movies, after all.

Cameron has a brilliant action writing style, with ample use of double dashes (—) to build and keep suspense for the reader.

Alien for dessert

The threshold sequence opens as the crew flies into the jungles of Pandora. Have you noticed that we never see the choppers take off? We never even see them climb. In this sequence, we can only see them descend. Do you believe this is coincidence, when every Hero’s Journey begins with a descent into the Special World? I don’t.

Jake goes exploring and the tension rises gradually, as he passes his first few tests in this new territory, assisted by Grace and her team. The third test – the Thanator – chases him away from his mates, until he is completely separated, and there is no way back before nightfall. Again, all mythical imagery…

Have a look at how the Thanatos is introduced in the script:

You have got to admit: this is a fun read. James Cameron doesn’t have to sell his script as badly as you and I do. He has to raise financing, yes, but by the mid 2000’s, people were pretty confident that Cameron would deliver the goods.

“This thing could eat a T-rex and have the Alien for desert.”

Note also that in this Threshold passage, Jake loses his rifle and his backpack. These are typically tools from the Ordinary World, and they are of no use in the new world. In a mythical sense, Jake is stripped naked from all that protected him, ready to be reborn.

And guess where he ends up in the final moments of this sequence… amneotic fluid, also known as Pandora water.

– Karel Segers

[vimeo 117134935 w=960 h=540]

Download the Avatar screenplay sample here.

Karel FG Segers

Karel Segers wrote his first produced screenplay at age 17. Today he is a story analyst with experience in acquisition, development and production. He has trained students worldwide, and worked with half a dozen Academy Award nominees. Karel speaks more European languages than he has fingers on his left hand, which he is still trying to find a use for in his hometown of Sydney, Australia. The languages, not the fingers.

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Karel FG Segers

Karel Segers wrote his first produced screenplay at age 17. Today he is a story analyst with experience in acquisition, development and production. He has trained students worldwide, and worked with half a dozen Academy Award nominees. Karel speaks more European languages than he has fingers on his left hand, which he is still trying to find a use for in his hometown of Sydney, Australia. The languages, not the fingers.

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:: 25 Rules for Writing and Telling Stories
:: How To Write A Genius Script
:: First Ten Pages: Horror
:: The ‘Lubitsch’ Touch
:: Script Review: ‘Groundhog Day’
:: 10 Secrets to Writing Success

Script Perfection

:: Be Comfortable with Solitude
:: The Writer’s Block Myth
:: Resources for Screenwriters
:: Go Back to Your Old, Failed Ideas Once in a While
:: Make Time For What You Love
:: Screenwriting Tip #1106 – Just Because Convention Says
:: Joseph McBrides’ Necessary Screenwriting Book

Pitching & Selling

:: From Option to Premiere: A Writer’s Journey #2
:: ‘The Hunger Games’ Pitch Trailer: Pitching Movies To Studios
:: September 2012 Pitch Sales Scorecard
:: Share Your Story: Getting Your Scripts Read
:: What a Film Festival Can Do For Your Career
:: Vince Gilligan on the Ups and Downs of Pitching ‘Breaking Bad’

Best of the Rest

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:: TIFF Movie Review: ‘Cloud Atlas’
:: Must Watch: Steven Spielberg’s ‘Lincoln’ Trailer
:: ‘Samsara’ Stills
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:: Weird Secrets of The Avengers That You’d Never Have Guessed
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:: The Halo Effect: Why You Won’t Believe Your Heroes Have Flaws
:: Wall-E and Eve are all Grown Up
_______________________________

With thanks to Jamie Campbell and Brooke Trezise.

Enjoy!

Karel

Jamie Campbell

Jamie Campbell is an author, screenwriter, and television addict.

Jamie is proud to be an Editor for The Story Department.

Her latest series Project Integrate is out now.

jamiecampbell.com.au

:: What Should Be Going On by Act 3?
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:: Draw Emotions into Black Comedy
:: Script Tip: Direct Conflict
:: Preaching
:: Brave Shows How to Create a Brand New Fairy Tale from Scratch
:: Podcast: Charlie Kaufman, Screenwriting Lecture at BAFTA
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Script Perfection

:: Screenwriting tip from ‪’Brave’
:: What Steve Said – The Learning Curve
:: More Advice for Young Writers
:: A Good Example of a Spec Script
:: Strong Dialogue Can Work in Many Places
:: Script Look: Super Friends – Written for the Market
:: How To Read A Screenplay

Pitching & Selling

:: 10 Rules of Blockbuster Movies that Hollywood Forgot
:: 10 Reasons Why I Pass on Scripts
:: Matching your Idea with the Hollywood Business Model
:: ‘Dark Knight Rises’ Marketing Hits the Streets

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:: Brave Review: Lives up to the Pixar Pedigree
:: 5 Tips For Building the DC Movie Universe
_______________________________

With thanks to Jamie C. and Brooke Trezise.

Enjoy!

Karel

Jamie Campbell

Jamie Campbell is an author, screenwriter, and television addict.

Jamie is proud to be an Editor for The Story Department.

Her latest series Project Integrate is out now.

jamiecampbell.com.au

by Lee Matthias

I wonder, though, if that would have worked for him when, just starting out, for producer Roger Corman he wrote THE LAST WOMAN ON EARTH and THE TOMB OF LIGEIA. Maybe he should have said that the audience “may forgive you, but the industry reader may not.”

The truth is that film openings are a writer’s best opportunity to demonstrate to the audience that the initial stake of goodwill given the film by the purchase of a ticket will be provided-for.

Strong openings are, believe it or not, payback. Titles begin the process, previews and advertising can continue it, but openings are where all that flash needs to become cash.

Strong openings are, believe it or not, payback.

Perhaps the hardest page to write in any screenplay is page one. In his book, Zen and the Art of Screenwriting , William Froug writes:

“I once knew a highly successful screenwriter, one of  the all-time greats, who spent a year writing and rewriting and rewriting page one. I know this first-hand because he asked me to come down to his office at 20th Century Fox one day to proudly show me (sic) his new screenplay. ‘What do you think of it?’ he said, smiling proudly as he leaned back in his chair. He handed me only one page, perfectly typed, marked page one. I read it and handed it back to him. ‘Jim,’I told him, ‘this is the same page you gave me to read a year ago, isn’t it?’ ‘Sure,’ he said, ‘but this time I know I’ve got it right.’”

 Titles begin the process, previews and advertising can continue it, but openings are where all that flash needs to become cash.

Terry Gilliam describes an opening that was never used for BRAZIL :

“There was a wonderful beginning that Tom (Stoppard) wrote, with a beetle in an idyllic rainforest, who is disrupted by a great tree-gobbling machine that reduces the forest to paper pulp, which is then poured into a truck that heads towards the city as the beetle flutters overhead. The truck enters a paper mill that spews out huge rolls of paper which are taken to a printworks, which then churns out reams of printed pages that are bound into a document, which lands on a technician’s desk. As the technician picks it up to swat the beetle that’s now buzzing around his office, we can see the title page: it is a government paper on saving the rainforests. I thought that just encapsulated everything, but we couldn’t afford to do it.”

Because, of course, then comes the rest of the script.     

The Start of Something Big

The James Bond series of films have always opened with a bang. Why? Because we are usually seeing the end of another, earlier Bond adventure. And this is always a good way to start action-styled stories, as it “hits the ground running.”

James Cameron, in his film, TRUE LIES, even paid homage to when he had Arnold Schwarzenegger appear at the beginning in a wet suit, only to strip it off revealing a tuxedo underneath, just as Sean Connery had done nearly thirty years earlier.

Story openings are very tricky things.

On the one hand, they need to initiate and perform the standard housekeeping all stories must do: set up the story’s world or universe, introduce the major characters (including setting up the villain, even if his first significant appearance isn’t until the second or third act), and create the interactions out of which the story can grow.

Story openings are very tricky things.

But they must also begin the process of fulfilling the promise the story makes to that audience of a satisfying story experience. One way to do this is to make the story’s opening a mini-movie in itself. One that offers, in microcosm, every essential thing the complete film offers in macrocosm. This means, effectively, a beginning, middle, and end.

The writer establishes the protagonist, places him in a dilemma, and then shows the protagonist taking action to resolve it. When done in an exciting or clever way, this has the effect of advancing that “promise” we alluded to toward the story ahead.

All of this must be done in the first ten minutes (ten pages), or so. As tall an order as that seems, it isn’t really so tough. The writer doesn’t need to be concerned with the kind of demands the larger story later places on the material: character development, back-story, motivation, etc.

Just introduce your hero, drop him into a thorny problem, and show him getting out in a novel and exciting way.

(Continue to Part 2)

-Lee Matthias
(from his book “Lateral Screenwriting”,
Publishing, June, 2012) 

I am a writer with three published novels, others on the way, a nonfiction book in the works, several screenplays written and in development.

During and after college, I worked as a theater projectionist and manager, in public relations, and as a literary agent selling to publishers and producers. Two heads are better than one, so I keep a human skull on my desk for inspiration (and a second opinion).

I currently work as a computer network administrator in government. I’m married and the father of two daughters. “I’m a computer professional: I don’t lie, I manage information.”

Story & Structure

:: On Flashbacks
:: Script Review: Saving Mr. Banks
:: The Secret to a Great First 10 Pages
:: Little Screen, Big Characters

Script Perfection

:: Screenwriting Tips: The Art of Titles
:: How to Get the Most Out of a Script Evaluation
:: Scene Description Spotlight: “Basic Instinct”

Pitching & Selling

:: Aspiring Screenwriter: Go Hollywood or Go Indie
:: How to Get Into a Film Festival – Advice from a Festival Director

Best of the Rest

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:: Joss Whedon: Hollywood’s Golden Boy
:: Nicholl Applications: Around the World in Screenplays
_______________________________

With thanks to Jamie C.

Enjoy!

Karel

Jamie Campbell

Jamie Campbell is an author, screenwriter, and television addict.

Jamie is proud to be an Editor for The Story Department.

Her latest series Project Integrate is out now.

jamiecampbell.com.au

_______________________________

With thanks to Sol.

Enjoy!

Karel

_______________________________

COMING SOON to the Story Department:

• The next week articles

With thanks to Sol.

Enjoy!

Karel

Karel FG Segers

Karel Segers wrote his first produced screenplay at age 17. Today he is a story analyst with experience in acquisition, development and production. He has trained students worldwide, and worked with half a dozen Academy Award nominees. Karel speaks more European languages than he has fingers on his left hand, which he is still trying to find a use for in his hometown of Sydney, Australia. The languages, not the fingers.

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The scene in this clip is a trademark Cameron setup.

Remember the unobtainium – ‘floating rock’ scene in Avatar? That is a case of exposition that some love and others loathe.

This scene from The Abyss sits around about the same time into this movie and sets up an equally important concept, which will be crucial in the movie’s climax.

The scene is in my view one of the most supreme examples of exposition. It combines character and tension with essential story information.

It shows how James Cameron has always been a tremendously gifted screenwriter.

Enjoy!

In fact – and contrary to the unobtainium scene – Ron Cobb confirmed to me that the fluid breathing system is not sci-fi but fact.  Hippy’s rat is submerged in actual fluid breathing system liquid and in this scene it is really breathing underwater. Apparently, Beany the rat survived for quite a while afterwards and died of natural causes.

(On the contrary – as you might have guessed – in the movie’s climax Ed Harris did not breathe liquid. The glass of his suit was tinted amber to suggest it was filled with the liquid.)

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Karel

Karel FG Segers

Karel Segers wrote his first produced screenplay at age 17. Today he is a story analyst with experience in acquisition, development and production. He has trained students worldwide, and worked with half a dozen Academy Award nominees. Karel speaks more European languages than he has fingers on his left hand, which he is still trying to find a use for in his hometown of Sydney, Australia. The languages, not the fingers.

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:: Christopher Nolan on what to expect from Batman 3

:: How to logline a dual plot story? John August helps.

:: Dick happy about Blade Runner (via Kottke).

:: Final word on the Oscars (and Karel agrees)

:: The North By Northwest shooting script for download

:: Charlie (and Donald) Kaufman’s Adaptation script

:: (we keep going…) The Shawshank Redemption script

:: Finally: Basic Instinct (for Forest Gump and MANY others, go to MyPDFscripts.com)

:: Hitchcock on Content vs. Technique (via Bill Martell)

:: To three-act-structure or free-form, that is the question.

:: Cultivating a following- writing for a TV series.

:: Advice: never send out your first screenplay.

:: Own up to your audience: your inciting incident.

:: What really goes on in act one?

:: Satire with a touch of truth: the Super Script

_______________________________

COMING SOON to the Story Department:

• The next week articles

With thanks to Sol.

Enjoy!

Karel

Karel FG Segers

Karel Segers wrote his first produced screenplay at age 17. Today he is a story analyst with experience in acquisition, development and production. He has trained students worldwide, and worked with half a dozen Academy Award nominees. Karel speaks more European languages than he has fingers on his left hand, which he is still trying to find a use for in his hometown of Sydney, Australia. The languages, not the fingers.

Subscribe to our YouTube Channel!